Category Archives: funny

An Open Letter to Whoever Messed With the Star Wars Action Figures in my Office

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Dear Friends and Colleagues, As many of you know, in my office, I keep a small number of classic Star Wars action figures, both for my children to play with when they visit me and to inspire a general sense …

Like Mike. If I could be like Mike

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AUTHOR’S NOTE: This story originally happened on April 19, 2009. I include it here as a testament to how dumb I am. So this morning, I got up at 4:07 a.m. to get out the door by 4:45 a.m. to …

What happens when your son finds the eggnog

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The Backstory Recently, our close family friends stayed in our home while we were on vacation. They were in the middle of moving – which is a nightmare for any family – and used our home as a base of …

How the song “Edelweiss” and 4th grade choir nearly destroyed my life

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Musical Trauma This past week, NBC produced a live broadcast of the classic musical The Sound of Music featuring country super-star Carrie Underwood, which was one of the highest rated shows of the year, and was, to my estimatation, was …

Unacceptable Christmas Music : Part 2

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OPENING NOTE: The following is a script for a TV commercial that must be made. It features me and my brother-in-law ranting about unacceptable Christmas music, which we have compiled onto on easy-to-destroy CD. Operators are standing by. DAVE Well, …

Unacceptable Christmas Music : Part 1

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Unacceptable Christmas Music I have started listening to Christmas music, since Thanksgiving is so late this year, I figured the “week of” was acceptable. I love Christmas music, but some of it is weird, and some of it I absolutely …

The Robot Chef

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NOTE: Today is the last day of school before the kids get out for a week for Thanksgiving, which means it’s “Read and Relax Day” where the kids get to come to school in the pajamas, have a potluck breakfast, …

The Worst Birthing Class Ever

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NOTE: My good buddy and his wife are expecting their first child in early 2014, so to prep my friend, I’m going to be giving him some advice. Tonight is their first class about pregnancy, so I thought I’d go …

Peeps

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Peeps and My Mother-in-Law This is a picture of a food product that is only available during the Easter season called “Peeps.” The reason I am showing you this picture is because these twin boxes of “Peeps” have been in …

Happy Birthday, Tony

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Tony’s Birthday Meet Tony. In the above picture, he is the one in the middle. He is my co-worker and friend. He officiated my wedding. All of his children are (or were) in my youth group. His nephew is Chase …