The Only Thing That’s Going to Flare is Racial Tensions With Your Co-workers
BACKGROUND: This month, I’ve been having a lot of stucco work done on my house. The guys were finishing up the final coat, and while they were doing that, I was applying some silicon sealant to a flat part of my roof before the rainy season hit. While on the roof, I overheard the two workers having this actual conversation. For the record, Kevin is a 50-year-old white guy and Raul is a 30-something Latino guy.
All it’s gonna take is one solar flare. One.
What’s a solar flare?
It’s like a burst from the sun. And all those satellites floating around in space will get burnt up.
And then, you won’t even be able to buy a loaf of bread from the store because all those credit card banking transactions – they all depend on those satellites.
Then what will happen?
What will happen? There will be mass rioting, that’s what’ll happen. Because you won’t even be able to buy a loaf of bread. Of course, your people should come out on top, if it comes to that.
BACKGROUND: Dropping my son off at school is always a feat, with dozens of parents converging at the same time. Today, I parked along the street and while walking hand-in-hand with my son, I got the privilege of overhearing this gem.
Oh my God! I love your bumper stickers.
(pointing to the back of her car)
Is that for the Thundercats? I love them.
Pointing to the back of the car.
These stickers. Thundercats, right? The cartoon from when we were kids!
I’m Sikh. Those are symbols from my religion.
It’s called the Khanda.
Oh, because it looks like.
(voice dropping off)
I mean, there’s new Thundercats movie coming out.
No. It’s a religious symbol. From my religion.
Oh. Okay then.
The lesson as always, is:
This is the Khanda, which symbolizes God’s Universal and Creative Power. In it’s center is a double edged sword, which symbolizes the primal and almighty power of the creator.
And this is the sword of Lion-O, the leader of the fictious cartoon warriors, The Thundercats.
It’s Got a Good Beat, Though
While in the gym this morning, the song Regulate by Warren G and Natedog came on Pandora and bumped through the gym. This song was really big when it was released in 1994, and frankly, it’s an example of why I never liked West Coast rap.
(as the song came on)
Wow. This takes me back.
BEN (the instructor):
Yeah. I haven’t heard this song in 8 years.
(screaming at the lot of us)
Gimme 10 Good Mornings!
Okay, so the general plot of this song seems to be the following: while riding in my car one evening, I got robbed at gun-point, then was involved in a deadly gun-fight, then I got some hookers.
Sounds like a typical Tuesday.
The Softest Rock Isn’t Talc, It’s Michael Bolton
BACKGROUND: While reading the above post, my wife and I had the following conversation:
I don’t remember the song Regulate. And Warren G? Isn’t he the saxophone guy?
That’s Kenny G.